In my earlier blog post I mentioned how fitness changed my life and saved me from depression. From a young age I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and to say that it has been a rough journey is an understatement. Living with anxiety is crippling and is often accompanied by depression, and for most of my life I thought that this was the only way. I tried medications, but I hated them and I hated the feeling of being dependent on something just to feel somewhat “normal.”
Thankfully, my mom enrolled me in dance lessons at a young age and that was a great distraction for me. Not only was it a distraction, it also pushed my mind, body, and soul beyond limits I could even imagine. Growing up in a volatile house, my only escape was the dance studio where I could go and lose myself in the music and movement that would flow with energy through my body. It was almost as if I was moving the music through my body and interpreting it into beautiful art. I danced for 14 years until I had to get a job and grow up and become an “adult,” and for about two years I was stagnant and I had fallen back into depression. When I stopped dancing, I lost my passion and overwhelming love for life and all that it had to offer. I fell into a cycle of unhealthy eating and not exercising and with that came weight gain. I had hit a wall and started to realize how truly unhappy I was. I felt horrible about myself and I knew that I was the only one that could change what was making me unhappy. So I decided to get a gym membership and my journey began!
It started out slowly for me. The first few weeks I was excited about my decision to finally become active again, but then after a few months I became frustrated with seeing no results. By no means was I over weight, but I had gained quite a few pounds and was looking a little “fluffy” from all of the bad behaviors I had picked up. I wanted what I wanted right then and there, but of course I knew that nothing would come easily and I needed to put in the time and the effort for the results I wanted. Sweat and discipline was what it came down to.
Over the next three years, something shifted in me and I began to love the burn, and I had ignited my passion for fitness once again. I loved seeing results and seeing those results only pushed me harder and harder. I would always set a goal and when I hit that goal I would constantly be coming up with new goals to achieve. Fitness changed my life because it made me realize my worst fear is becoming stagnant, and being stagnant led to depression and anxiety. When I wasn’t active I was lazy, and not only when It came to exercise, I was lazy in every aspect of my life.
Since regaining my love for fitness and life I have gained discipline and strength. I don’t just set goals in the gym, I set goals in work, college, and life. I set goals daily and I set long term goals because I am always striving to be the best version of myself and I attribute that to fitness.